Archive for March 12th, 2008
Girls Gone Wild creator Joe Francis has settled his legal matters in Florida and is finally a free man. The boobies-obsessed Wunderkind will be back in Los Angeles sometime tonight, according to TMZ:
Francis has plead no contest to the charges of filming underage girls, and has been sentenced to time served. He will be on six months’ “non-reporting” probation, and “Girls Gone Wild” can’t film in the area for three years. Bay County, we’re told, will return Joe’s brand new Ferrari, and $60,000 that they confiscated from him last year.
The Superficial would like to celebrate Joe Francis: Pioneer, Grade A Asshole, and World Traveler. I like to believe him and I are cut from the same cloth. Except mine is made from old Star Wars sheets and Joe Francis’ is made from fine silk, gold and the pubic hair of drunk busty virgins God I hate him so much.
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March 12th, 2008

Britney Spears decided to go animated for her latest music video. She came up with the idea herself to use a cartoon version of herself, according to The Sun:
The audacious promo to forthcoming single Break The Ice is set in a futuristic world, and sees Brit depicted as a pretty, slim line superhero.
I’m going to assume Britney was strung out on an original Sam Lutfi cocktail when she came up with this idea. The funny part is somebody actually went along with it. Can you imagine taking art direction from Britney Spears? I’m surprised she didn’t suggest the whole video be shot inside a bucket of KFC while she wears a cole slaw bikini.**Video concept copyright 2008 The Superficial Writer. Steal my idea, Heidi Montag, and I’ll sue your implants off. Unless you make me the director. Scene 1: We’re in a hot tub and Spencer just got eaten by a duck…
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March 12th, 2008

Jenna Jameson unveiled her new PETA ad which suggests, to save our furry brethren, you should “Pleather Yourself.” Okay… done. Now what? Take a nap? On it. Wow, I rule at this. Fear not, woodland creatures, I’ve got you covered. (No pun intended.) Zzzz….
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March 12th, 2008