Megan Fox is single. I should just quit right now because I’ll never report anything than can top this slice of awesome. (Unless Hayden Panettiere decides she hates clothes but loves bloggers.) Anyway, according to the latest issue of Star, Megan has called off her engagement to Brian Austin Green because she’s too young for a commitment:
Sources claim the 22 year-old sent business associates correspondence last week telling them the sad news.
An insider says: “Megan still cares about Brian, but she now realizes she’s too young to marry him.”
True, Megan does have her whole life ahead of her. But I like to believe she woke up one morning, looked beside her then immediately panicked: “Where am I? Brian Austin Green!? Eww! EWW!” Brian, realizing the jig was up, tried to neutralize the situation: “Shh. Shh. You’re okay. Can I interest you in a mixed drink?” When that didn’t work, he frantically phoned Ian Ziering: “Dude, she’s onto us. I dunno how, but we’re toast. Call Priestley; have him fire up the jet. No, we’re not bringing Dustin Diamond. Fuck that guy.”
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July 5th, 2008
I’ve never seen Keanu so Keanu-y. In trying to take on the role of an alien, he’s somehow become an exaggerated, even more lifeless version of himself, and it’s very, very strange to behold. If standard Keanu was the final boss of a video game, this trailer’s Keanu is like the super powerful, insanely difficult version that emerges after you beat the normal one. Keanu but more so, and all without even uttering a “whoa.”Continue Reading “‘Day the Earth Stood Still’ Trailer is Incredibly Keanu-y”
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July 5th, 2008
Britney Spears, seen here with her bodyguard, is secretly back at it with Adnan Ghalib. But this time Britney is pulling some James Bond action and using her vagina (It shoots darts.) to get back a sex tape Adnan made with her, according to the Daily Mail:
But sources claim the two haven’t got back together for purely romantic reasons - Britney is apparently terrified Adnan has an explicit video of her during the couple’s brief trip to Mexico in January.
‘Britney’s really scared that Adnan has a sex tape,’ an insider tells MailOnline. ‘She wants to get it out of his hands.’
I can’t really envision Britney Spears as the stealth espionage type. I can just see her trying to sneak around Adnan’s house, but then she knocks over the fridge and stumbles through a wall. And that’s just looking for a cookie. A hidden sex tape? Jesus. Adnan might as well have banged a wrecking ball then let it loose in his living room. Not that he hasn’t before, but I’m just sayin’.
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July 5th, 2008
