Jessica Simpson and her sister Ashlee sunbathed on a yacht while watching Tony Romo perform in a golf tournament at Lake Tahoe. Meanwhile, below deck, Joe Simpson flushed the GPS down the toilet and cut the fuel lines. Best family vacation ever!
Add comment July 14th, 2008
If the Earth started to feel a little more crowded this weekend, that’s because Angelina Jolie birthed her twins, a boy Knox Leon and a girl Vivienne Marcheline, late Saturday night. Compared to their siblings, these two got off easy in the name department. Angelina’s obstetrician Dr. Michael Sussmann updated the press on everyone’s condition - then handed out lollipops; he’s that good. The AP reports:
“He was very happy. … The emotion was very strong for him,” Sussmann told reporters on the hospital steps. “I felt the emotion of both the mother and the father. Angelina Jolie was speaking, was laughing with her husband. They were happy.”
“The mother, the babies, the father are doing marvelously well,” he said.
While this is great news for Angelina and Brad, this is terrible news for me. I lost the office pool. Here’s the names I picked. I dunno how I didn’t win:BOYS:Captain America.Jon Voight Just Kidding I Still Hate you Daddy.Maddox. (He won’t mind.)GIRLS:Licorice Petunia.~. (Pronounced “Squiggly line thingy.”)Melissa.Congrats to the Pitt-Jolie clan! Please don’t assimilate me.
Add comment July 14th, 2008
Pamela Anderson partook in some activism while in Australia today. She stopped by a KFC to hand deliver a letter to the corporation citing their abuse of chickens. (I hear they eat them.) Here’s an excerpt of the letter from PETA’s website:
I’ve been in Australia filming Big Brother, in which my housemates and I are confined and sealed off from the outside world, much like the chickens who are crammed inside barns for KFC. Fortunately, I won’t be stomped to death, have my legs broken or be scalded to death in a tank of hot water—yet, as PETA’s undercover videos have revealed, the chickens raised for KFC’s restaurants in Australia often suffer these abuses.
Here’s the fun part: Pamela Anderson made half a mil to appear on Big Brother whose biggest sponsor happens to be, surprise! KFC. Now that’s hypocrisy you can shake a nipple at. In the meantime, how the hell did Pam get out of the house? I thought she had to stay crammed in there like chickens in a barn, according to her letter. Way to negate the entire show’s authenticity, Pam. What’ll you ruin next? Christmas? Jesus, soon we’ll find out even your breasts are fake - Ho. Ly. Shit.
Add comment July 14th, 2008
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