It seems like you can’t run a celebrity website laced with Herculean commentary these days without running into rumors that Katie Holmes is pregnant as several sources claim these pictures prove. If not wearing a bra and trying to cut more glass than Jennifer Aniston in Antarctica constitutes being with child, then yes, Katie Holmes is knocked up. Otherwise, for God’s sake, please just leave the woman alone so Tom Cruise can finally install her penis, and then we’ve got a story.
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August 17th, 2008
Before adorning her ass, Kim Kardashian’s shorts once functioned as a table cloth for a family of 12, a hot air balloon cover and an old time revival tent. They would later go on to become the official plaid donor for not only the PGA tour, but the entire country of Scotland. True story.
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August 17th, 2008
Ed McMahon’s house was on the verge of foreclosure until a lone toupee-d knight swooped in and saved him. The Donald is feeling benevolent these days and worked out a deal to buy Ed’s house and lease it right back to him. People reports:
Trump, who does not know McMahon personally, said it “would be an honor” to help out the man who spent three decades as Johnny Carson’s sidekick on The Tonight Show. “When I was at the Wharton School of Business I’d watch him every night.”
McMahon, 85, bought the six-bedroom house in January 1990. Down from a peak price of $7 million, the property was listed at a bargain $4.6 million last weekend, according to the Los AngelesTimes.
Damn, that’s some heartwarming stuff. In the midst of a nationwide housing crisis, I couldn’t help but worry that Ed McMahon wouldn’t get to die in a giant mansion. But now, thanks to Donald Trump and his triumph of the human spirit, Ed won’t have to spend his remaining years in some crummy luxury condo overlooking the coast. If that’s not the feel good story of the year, folks, I don’t know what is.
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August 17th, 2008
