Archive for October 9th, 2008

Celeb News: Scary Spice modeling lingerie just frightened my pants off (In a good way)


These are pics of Melanie “Scary Spice” Brown modeling the Ultimo Autumn/Winter lingerie line. Sort of gives a whole new meaning to “hot chocolate” doesn’t it? A ha ha ha wait, hold up. I shouldn’t have brought color into this. That was wrong of me, and I apologize. Instead, I should just respect Melanie for who she is: A beautiful woman with ginormous breasts who I’d have sex with until she realizes I’m not Keanu Reeves. See? Much better.Respect: It’s dope!

Photos: Splash News

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Gossip: Britney Spears wears her bra like a big girl


Britney Spears did a little shopping yesterday in West Hollywood and continued to defy expectations by wearing a bra. Granted, anyone within a mile radius could see it, I’m not going to be the asshole to take this victory away from her. That’s like disqualifying a pole vaulter in the Special Olympics for impaling the judge. Do you have no soul?

Photos: Splash News

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Celeb Gossip: Casey Aldridge is only putting babies in Jamie Lynn Spears

1008_jamie_lynn_ok_00.jpgClearly before news of a potential bun in the oven hit today, Jamie Lynn Spears and her boyfriend Casey Aldridge sat down with OK! Magazine to address the rumors that he was cheating on Jamie Lynn with 28-year-old Kelli Dawson and others:

“That is just completely fabricated,” adds Jamie Lynn. “He never had an intimate relationship with her, so how would that be possible? Around here, that particular girl is known to make up stories.”
And then there’s Whitney Seals, who supposedly romanced Casey. Says Jamie Lynn, “What happened was that one of those girls did it, and in this small town when one of them does it, they’re all like, ‘Good idea.’ They all jumped on the bandwagon.”
“In a small town, everybody knows everybody,” he explains. “But when money’s involved, you find out who your friends are.”
As for reports he impregnated Kelli, a stunned Casey told OK!, “That’s news to me.”

Of course that’s news to Casey Aldridge. I mean, all he did was have unprotected sex numerous times with Kelli Dawson where he ejaculated his semen into her birth canal. Sheeit, that’s not how you make a baby.**For our readers in the South, that is, actually, how you make a baby. My apologies for telling you therefore causing Baby Jesus to cry.

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