Archive for October 22nd, 2008
My new favorite British monstrosity Jodie Marsh stopped by a radio show yesterday and sent out a request for sperm from any willing donor. You see, Jodie’s apparently a lesbian now but won’t let that stop her from trying to conceive. Because there’s nothing a child loves more than finding out its father is some dude with too much free time and a turkey baster. The Sun reports:
She recently admitting she’s started a relationship with hairdresser NINA.
Jodie said: “I’ve had loads of s**t men. I can see why women turn lesbian, because you get to the point where you’re sick of hearing so much f***ing bull***t, so you start to look elsewhere.”
Here’s the best part: Right after her nationwide request for man sauce, Jodie scooted off to a local Starbucks to promote the “Bring Your Own Mug” event to reduce waste. Yeah. So, to all my readers across the pond, you might want to order that latte with a shot of penicillin. Or you can dodge the pee-burning bullet altogether and get your Dunkin on. Do they even have those in England? If not, immediately start swimming west. I’ll save a glazed for you.
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October 22nd, 2008
Photos of Nick Hogan being greeted outside of Pinellas County jail by his sister Brooke just started popping up, and this looks like a touching reunion. And by touching reunion I mean their children are going to have extra limbs.NICK: Listen, don’t get freaked out. But I have a boner.BROOKE: It’s okay, Nicky. *whispers* So do I.NICK: JESUS! That’s not a Mag-Lite?! I want back in. GUARD!
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October 22nd, 2008
Britney Spears’ court case for driving without a California license case has been declared a mistrial today. After three days of deliberations, jurors couldn’t reach a unanimous decision on a verdict. Though most of them agreed the trial was a giant waste of time considering it was for a misdemeanor charge, and she had a valid Louisiana license at the time. E! News reports:
After five votes, the jury foreman confirmed they were deadlocked 10-2 in favor of acquitting the pop star. All told, the jurors deliberated slightly more than eight hours over a verdict—more time, incidentally, than the lawyers took to try the case.
“A lot of people had their minds set from the beginning,” he said, adding that many of his fellow jurors agreed that the trial was a waste of time.
He also said that the main sticking point for the panel was the issue of residency versus domicile, something the jury took to the judge earlier today.
Yeah, residency versus domicile. Shit happens to me all the time. Anyway, if you’re wondering why Britney is crying in these pictures, they started charging for extra whipped cream at Starbucks. Her accountant informed her she’d be bankrupt by Friday unless she pulls back to the regular serving and, no, she can’t sell her children on eBay - even if “they be all dressed like puppies, ya know?”
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October 22nd, 2008
