Archive for October 27th, 2008
Nicole Richie looked uncharacteristically hot (for her) at the Carnival of Hope gala over the weekend. I say uncharacteristically because she usually looks like Gollum with tits. How she pulled off this miraculous transformation is beyond me, but I’ve got top scientists over at NASA looking into it.UPDATE: Got a reply!
TO: The Superficial
SUBJECT: Re: URGENT: Nicole Richie gave me a boner, please advisePerhaps I wasn’t clear in our last correspondence, so let me simplify the terms:We make rockets go “BOOM” so Joe the Spaceman can fly to the moon.I really don’t know how to make that anymore understandable without the use of puppets, so for the last time, stop e-mailing us.That said, the bitch stopped doing H.Peace out,Dr. Scott Brooks,NASAP.S. QUIT POSTING ABOUT HEIDI & SPENCER!
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October 27th, 2008
Could Traci Bingham be anymore trashy?I so went there.NOTE: Photos are quasi-NSFW depending on your boss’ eyesight. But just in case:NO NIPPLES HERE! JUST INSANE LEVELS OF PRODUCTIVITY AND NOT TRACI BINGHAM’S HUGE AREOLAS! ABSOLUTELY NO SLIGHTLY VISIBLE NIPPLES THAT REMIND ME OF YOUR WIFE’S LUSCIOUS BREASTS FROM LAST YEAR’S CHRISTMAS PARTY! THOSE ARE NOT ON THE SCREEN I’M ABOUT TO MINIMIZE BECAUSE I SAW YOU LOOKING! I HAVE KIDS!(You’re welcome.)
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October 27th, 2008
AnnaLynne McCord, star of the CW’s 90210 reboot, hosted the 5th Anniversary of Christian Audiger The Nightclub on Saturday. I’ve been reticent about this show since it premiered, but I gotta ask, was a new 90210 really necessary? I can think of several things I’d need before it would appear remotely interesting:1. Alzheimer’s.2. My Xbox broke and all the porn on the Internet was deleted.3. Nuclear holocaust.4. Alcohol poisoning5. The remote’s on the coffee table waaay over there, and I realized it’s impossible to swallow my own tongue.And even then…
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October 27th, 2008
