Like the strange warts you got from the strip club restroom, clips of Britney Spears’ new documentary Britney: For the Record continue to show up online. The latest features Britney doing an impersonation of her father/conservator Jamie Spears talking on the phone (via Us Magazine):
“This is my dad,” Spears, 26, says while pacing back and forth between takes of her “Womanizer” video.
“‘Britney, get your a– in here and sit down right there!’” she says, switching into a Southern twang. Jamie – Spears’ permanent conservator – spent most of his life in Louisiana.
“‘She don’t listen to me,’” Spears continues. “‘She screams at me, and she gets on me [for] screaming at her…you have to talk some f–king sense into her.”
While the impression is pretty remarkable coming from Britney Spears, I couldn’t help but notice one glaring fact. Turns out when Jamie Spears talks on the phone he disappears for an hour. Think about that for a second, he’s gone for AN HOUR. Who’s watching Britney? This of course explains how she’s meeting men and why the pies cooling on my windowsill keep disappearing.Video after the jump.
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November 21st, 2008
Wanna know Samantha Ronson’s secret to keeping Lindsay Lohan a lesbian? Punching. Lots and lots of punching. Sam reportedly let the fists fly early yesterday morning at a London nightclub when she saw Lindsay dancing with her ex Calum Best, according to The Sun:
A shocked onlooker revealed yesterday: “Lindsay was having a boogie on the dance floor with Calum. They were getting pretty close to each other and Sam was nowhere to be seen.
“And then all hell broke loose. Sam came screeching up to Lindsay, screaming blue murder and throwing punches. She went ballistic. The pair traded a series of blows before Calum managed to prise them apart. It was a really ugly scene.”
Once out in the lobby the two kissed and made up. And by made up I mean it was Lindsay’s turn to open a can:
Another eyewitness revealed: “Lindsay was furious with what Sam had done. She launched herself at Sam in the lobby. She was spitting at her and clawing at her chest. She was fuming.”
I included pics of Lindsay looking all forlorn outside the club in her car. Never before have I seen a woman so desperately miss the penis. Hang in there, champ. Your career’ll be dead before you know it, and then you can have wang until the cows come home. Don’t stop believing!UPDATE: Page Six reports Lindsay and Sam are now seeing a couples counselor because of the fight. Apparently, this shit happens a lot which would be hot if Samantha Ronson didn’t look like a coked-out Squiggy from Laverne & Shirley. I went there.
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November 21st, 2008
There’s no real reason I’m posting these, I’m just fond of photos of Victoria Beckham. Boy, that’s some natural looking cleavage isn’t it? I’m pretty sure her plastic surgeon just cut an orange in half and super glued them in there.
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November 21st, 2008
