Archive for December 30th, 2008
Tony Romo asked for Jessica Simpson after collapsing in the Cowboys shower room from popped cartilage in his ribs. TMZ reports:
As if totally choking in the biggest game of the season weren’t bad enough, Tony Romo had to have Jessica “Yoko” Simpson rush to his side to help him with a little popped-out cartilage.
In Tony Romo’s defense if I thought I was dying, I’d be crying for my girlfriend’s insane cleavage too.TONY: Oh, God, bring me Jessica. I need Jessica!COACH: All we have is a can of Campbell’s Chunky Soup with two water balloons taped to it.TONY: That’ll work.
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December 30th, 2008
Sarah Palin’s unwed teenage daughter Bristol Palin gave birth to a baby boy Saturday, according to People:
“We think it’s wonderful,” said Colleen Jones, the sister of Bristol’s grandmother Sally Heath, who confirmed the news. “The baby is fine and Bristol is doing well. Everyone is excited.”
The baby’s name is Tripp Easton Mitchell Johnston and he was born at 5:30 a.m., according to Jones.
Tripp? Seriously? I don’t get why Bristol’s being subtle. She might as well name her son “Hey, mom, I smoke my face off and have unprotected sex with my redneck boyfriend every time you’re at church.” I mean, it’s Sarah Palin we’re talking about here. She’s just gonna call the kid a “Maverick” then give him a handgun to play with. “Aw, is there anything more adorable? *BAM* That dog was getting old anyway. *BAM* Hey, it’s not like I can’t remarry. *BAM* Oh, boy, I get to meet Jesus!”
Photos: WENN
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December 30th, 2008
- Jennifer Lopez, despite rumors to the contrary, is not getting a divorce, according to her rep. Oh, well, if her rep says so, then it must be true. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get one of these rep people to tell a child support judge I’ve been sterile my entire life. Infallible logic wins again! [E! Online]- Jessica Simpson’s boyfriend Dallas quarterback Tony Romo collapsed in the shower after suffering a rib injury in yesterday’s game against the Eagles. At this time, I’d like to point out to Jessica Simpson that all my ribs are in working order. Just putting it out there on the off-chance she learned to read recently. Ha, who am I kidding? [ESPN]- Chris Martin can apparently walk among us normal folks without being recognized. Seems no one knows who the Coldplay singer is despite the fact he bangs Gwyneth Paltrow. I’m failing to see the problem here. Does he want people to know he diddles a woman who’s one Pilates class away from looking from Madonna? I’d keep that on the down-low, Jim. It’s Chris? Okay, sure. [Page Six]- Oprah Winfrey has been duped by another memoir writer. After raving over Holocaust survivor Herman Rosenblat’s novel Angel on the Fence about meeting his wife in a concentration camp, the story has been debunked and pulled off bookshelves. Which is great, just great. Now who’s going to pitch my memoir Yes, Ladies, It’s That Big, Shoots Diamonds, Gives Back Rubs and Knows How to Maximize Deductions for the Tax Return You Deserve! Sonofa…. [TMZ]
Photos: WENN
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December 30th, 2008
